


All Hell Breaks Loose

by toristiel



Category: Big Hero 6 (2014)
Genre: I'm Going to Hell, I'm Sorry, Multi
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-11-30
Updated: 2014-12-12
Packaged: 2018-02-27 12:12:27
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 6
Words: 10,035
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2692526
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/toristiel/pseuds/toristiel
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Hiro meets a demon in an alley in San Fransokyo on his birthday, and there's really only one thing he wants</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So I'm still an emotional wreck after watching this movie. This is sort of a cross-over between Supernatural and Big Hero Six, but really the only cross-over-y part is the fact that Hiro meets a demon and hellhounds and such. The rating may change eventually and there is a very strong possibility that there will be eventually hidashi/hamadacest so please don't hate me. Criticism is greatly appreciated.

ag·o·ny

/ˈaɡənē/

_noun_

  *          extreme physical or mental suffering.



_"He crashed to the ground in agony"_

_Synonyms:_ pain, hurt, suffering, torment, anguish

 

Hiro wasn’t sure what he’d hoped to accomplish, but it wasn’t this. He stared at the bright screen, the definition, and thought that not even agony could begin to encompass how he felt. Actually, he was starting to believe nothing could.

 

It’d been two months since Callaghan was caught. Things were looking up for Hiro. He had started his classes, spent his evenings and most of his days in the Nerd Lab, and had five of the best friends he could ask for (yes, that included the inflatable marshmallow robot). He should be happy. He should be moving on, going forward with his life. But none of it made up for the fact that Tadashi was still gone.

 

Sighing, Hiro grabbed his hoodie, spun his chair around, and stood up. He averted his eyes away from Tadashi’s portion of their– _his_ –room, and walked out. Avoiding the steps that he knew creaked on the way down the stairs, he quickly found himself walking outside under the hazy night sky of San Fransokyo. Aunt Cass wouldn’t be up for another few hours, and while many of the city’s inhabitants were still out during the late hour, Hiro took the time to stroll the less-traveled alley-ways in relative silence.

 

Once he was a decent distance from the café, he reached into his hoodie pocket and pulled out a carton of cigarettes. Of course, being the child-genius that he was, Hiro knew it was a filthy habit. He also knew Tadashi would have had a fit at the mere thought of it. That did nothing, however, to stop him from lighting one and taking a long pull. Slowly, now leaning against the alley wall, he felt his nerves begin to untangle. He breathed, ironically, easier with each hit on cigarette, blowing out a puff of smoke into the cool air. Tears burned in his eyes, but he made no effort to wipe them away.

 

“You know what to day is, Tadashi,” he whispered, staring up at the sky. “If you were here, you’d be waking me up in a couple hours with that God-awful singing of yours… And Aunt Cass would close the café for the day… It’s my first birthday in the Nerd Lab, you know.” He gave a small laugh, tears now running down his cheeks. “Wonder how that’s going to go.”

 

He went a few moments in silence, smoking, wishing he could see the stars through the hazy lights that the city cast upon the sky. Finally, he let out a choked sob. “You couldn’t have waited a few seconds? Just a few seconds, Tadashi… That’s all it would’ve taken.”

 

Smothering out the cigarette on the brick behind him, Hiro turned to make his way back towards the café. Instead, he was stopped in his tracks by a tall, curvy woman wearing a glittering black dress. He hadn’t heard her approach, but she looked at him as if she’d been standing there a while.

 

“You’re talking out loud, Hiro, but I don’t see a Tadashi anywhere,” she greeted, red painted lips quirked in a small smile that Hiro assumed was meant to be sympathetic.

 

“Who are you?” Hiro asked, taking a weary step back. “And how do you know my name?”

 

The woman laughed, flipping her wavy black hair over her shoulder. “Don’t worry, boy. I’m just here to… grant you a little birthday wish.”

 

“Um, sure. Well, it’s past my bedtime, and I have some stuff to do tomorrow, so I’ll just get back to you on-” Hiro was turning to go, already taking a step forward in the opposite direction, but the woman cut him off with something much more intriguing than before.

 

“I can give you your brother back, Hiro.”

 

The boy stopped in his tracks, back stiffening, but refused to turn around. He didn’t move, waiting for her to go on.

 

“I can give him back to you- alive, perfectly healthy, just as he was before the fire. He won’t even remember dying.”

 

“Lady, what the hell is wrong with you?” Hiro asked, spinning around to face her, rage boiling inside of him. “You can’t bring Tadashi back. He’s _dead._ Now how do you know me and _what do you want?”_

She didn’t seem surprised at the burst of anger, only raising an eyebrow. What happened next came as a complete shock to Hiro, however. The woman’s eyes, a dark brown, suddenly flicked to deep crimson. “I’m demon, baby. I can do whatever I want, and I can bring back your brother. Your friends will still remember the last few months and everything you’ve done, only there will be enough memory of Tadashi for them to think he was there at your side. You asked for it, Hiro. What if he _had_ waited a few more seconds? The building would’ve gone up, Callaghan would have the microbots, yes, but Tadashi would be alive and well.”

 

Hiro pondered the offer, looking down at the ground and wondering how crazy the whole thing was. Could this even be real? What if he’d finally gone off the deep end and this was all just some hallucination or a dream? Despite the absurdity, the _impossibility,_ Hiro found himself beginning to go along with it.

 

“So, if you really can bring back Tadashi- you said you were a demon. What’s the catch? My immortal soul?” He laughed at the idea, but the woman seemed to take it a little more seriously.

 

“Normally, you’d have ten years. But for Tadashi Hamada, I’m afraid I can only give you one. That’s one whole year, Hiro. And you could spend it with your brother.” She spoke softly, convincingly.

 

Hiro bit his lip. “And what happens when a year is up?”

 

“I come back and my hellhounds take your soul,” she said simply.

 

Hiro nodded, hardly able to believe he was actually considering this. “And Tadashi? What happens to him?”

 

“He lives the full life that he was meant to.”

 

“Where do I sign?”


	2. Chapter Two

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Whoa I can't believe you guys are actually liking this :) Thanks so much for all the comments, they really mean a lot. I'm going to try and update the story daily, but it might be every other day with semester exams coming up. Thanks for reading!

Hiro walked home feeling absolutely ridiculous. He was pretty sure the “demon’s” lipstick had smeared off on his lips, and he couldn’t believe that he was actually going along with her craziness. Still, if there was even the slightest chance that Tadashi… _Why are you getting your hopes up? You’re smarter than this._

After the deal was made, the woman had given Hiro nothing more than a smirk, snapping her manicured fingers and just… disappearing. He had stood around a few seconds, wondering if she was going to come back, then spent at least thirty minutes combing the alley for any form of technology she could’ve used to pull off the disappearing stunt. After nearly falling in a dumpster and twisting his ankle, Hiro decided to call it a night and come back tomorrow.

It was 3 a.m. when Hiro snuck back into the café. Three hours into his birthday and he’d already supposedly sold his soul. He snorted at the thought, tiptoeing up the stairs. _Don’t be so gullible, Hiro. She was just messing with you. And somehow using some kind of crazy advanced tech.._. Nearing halfway to the top of the stairs, Hiro stopped in his tracks, noticing a light from around the corner coming from the direction of his room. _Please say I just forgot to turn it off,_ he thought, hoping Aunt Cass hadn’t decided to go check on him while he was out.

 

Focused on the light, he didn’t see Mochi sitting on the step above him. One ill-placed foot and a yelping cat later, Hiro found himself flailing his arms in attempt to keep from falling back. Heart racing, he grasped onto the stair railing, narrowly avoiding a downward tumble.

 

“Who let you out of the room?” he hissed after the retreating ball of orange and white fluff before turning back towards the top of the staircase. Hiro paused outside his door, which was cracked open with the soft light flooding out. He groaned inwardly, explanation already forming on him lips. “Aunt Cass,” he started as he walked in. “I can expl-”

 

“Hiro, I thought you were done bot-fighting,” Tadashi said, arms crossed.

 

Hiro did a double take, going so far as to rub his eyes as he stood frozen in the doorway, mouth hanging open in shock.

 

_Tadashi?_

He looked exactly the same. Not a scratch or burn on him. Exactly. The. Same. _I’m dreaming,_ Hiro thought with a crushing realization. But the stern look on Tadashi’s face would’ve been hard for even Hiro’s mind to recreate, and everything seemed so real. So… normal. It’d been months since Hiro had seen Tadashi, but the whole thing just felt like the most natural event in the world. It felt like the past months hadn’t happened. Like Tadashi had never been gone in the first place.

 

“Nii-chan…” Hiro whispered, lower lip trembling as he stared at his brother. _How is this possible?_

 

“Hiro, what’s wrong?” Tadashi asked, switching immediately from disappointed to concerned. “You’re kind of freaking me out.”

 

After that, Hiro couldn’t keep from bounding into Tadashi’s unsuspecting arms. After hesitating briefly out of confusion, Tadashi wrapped Hiro up in an embrace, clearly unsure what was bothering the younger Hamada but there for him nonetheless. A sob worked its way up in Hiro’s throat, and he began committing to memory the way it felt to have Tadashi’s arms around him again, the way Tadashi’s voice sounded as he questioned Hiro, Tadashi’s hand moving comforting circles around Hiro’s back, just… _Tadashi._

 

“Hiro, hey, you can tell me what’s wrong,” Tadashi prompted, words barely above a low whisper. Hiro took a rattled breath, trying to steady himself before forcing himself to take a step back.

 

“I-I’m fine. I’m great, actually,” He promised, wiping the tears from his eyes as his face slowly broke into a grin. “And you? Are you feeling alright? Baymax, _ouch_.”

 

Hiro heard the robot begin to inflate, but he refused to look away from Tadashi, afraid that doing so would result in him disappearing again. “I heard a sound of distress, Hiro. Is everything alright?” the “huggable” healthcare-giver announced as he shuffled over.

 

“Baymax, scan Tadashi,” Hiro commanded, bouncing on the balls of his feet, barely able to contain his excitement. _He’s alive. Oh, my God, he’s really alive._

 

Instead of scanning, Baymax stared at Hiro blankly. “Tadashi is here.”

 

Hiro raised his eyebrows in confusion, glancing over at Baymax then back to Tadashi, who now appeared even more worried than before. “What? Yeah, I know. Scan Tadashi.”

 

The robot looked over to Tadashi. “Scan complete. Tadashi Hamada’s health is in perfect condition. But you said Tadashi was-”

 

It didn’t take Hiro long to figure out what Baymax’s next words were going to be, and he interrupted quickly. “Thank you, Baymax. I’m satisfied with my care.” To Hiro’s relief, Baymax didn’t continue, instead shuffling back to his charging station and slowly deflating. _Did Baymax remember Tadashi dying?_ Hiro wondered, making a mental note to ask later. And if Baymax had, did that mean everyone else did too? _She said they would forget._

“What’s gotten into you, Hiro?” Tadashi demanded, giving him a stern look.

 

Hiro shrugged. “I, uh, was out walking and I thought that we hadn’t checked Baymax’s scanner in a while so I thought it’d be a good idea to do that…” He looked hopefully up at his brother, mentally pleading him not to press the issue.

 

Tadashi shook his head, apparently deciding to let Hiro off the hook. “What am I going to do with you, knucklehead?” he asked, sighing and ruffling Hiro’s perpetually messy hair. Instead of ducking away as he usually would have, Hiro allowed it, knowing good and well what it felt like to think he’d never feel that again. “Happy birthday, by the way. Now, _please,_ get some rest. Believe it or not, I’ve actually got plans for us in the morning. First birthday at the Nerd Lab, remember?”

 

Hiro nodded but didn’t move. “Can I… sleep in your bed tonight?”

 

“You’re fifteen, Hiro,” Tadashi reminded, eyebrows raised. “That’s a bit old to be sleeping with me, don’t you think?”

 

Hiro bit his lip, still not moving, trying to think of a good explanation to not let Tadashi out of his sight.

 

“Is this about the fire again?” Tadashi asked suddenly, and Hiro stiffed. _He doesn’t know… does he?_ “You had another nightmare, didn’t you? You know I’m not leaving you, Ototo. I promise.” He placed a hand on Hiro’s shoulder, looking at him with wide brown eyes, and Hiro found himself actually believing him. “You can sleep with me tonight, but please start trying to get over the fire, Hiro. It was a close call, but I’m still here, and nothing is going to change that.”

 

The two brothers didn’t say much after that, and Hiro crawled into Tadashi’s bed as the older Hamada turned off the light. Once he could feel Tadashi next to him, Hiro allowed himself to relax slightly, letting the darkness wash over him. He didn’t quite fall asleep, but he allowed his mind to wonder as the sound of Tadashi’s breathing evened out and became a light snore.

 

_Tadashi’s alive, Tadashi’s alive, alivealivealive. And I have a year._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I feel like that was really rushed, so sorry if it seemed that way to y'all too. Criticism is, as always, greatly appreciated :)


	3. Chapter Three

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so sorry this took so long. I have no excuse... Hope y'all like it :)

Hiro woke in the morning to a cool and empty bed. His heart dropped, and he squeezed his eyes shut as they began to burn with tears. _It was a dream,_ he thought, feeling like he was going to either scream or throw up. _Of course it was a dream._

Opening his eyes, he did one hopeful sweep around the room, searching for any sign at all that last night had really happened. Everything was in the same place as it had been the night before; a pair of tennis shoes lay by the closet door, one on top of the other. One of Hiro’s shirts was draped over the back of his desk-chair, and Hiro’s bed was still unmade (although he couldn’t remember a time it wasn’t).

The whole room was in perfect disorder- except for one thing. “Tadashi’s hat is gone,” Hiro whispered, eyes fixated on the empty spot on his desk that he had placed the blue cap. Suddenly, from the hallway, came the most beautiful and welcome sound he had heard in his life. “Hiro! You gonna sleep all day?”

Tossing the covers off of himself, Hiro jumped out of bed, a huge grin on his face as Tadashi entered the room. The older Hamada was completely dressed and ready for the day, wearing a white t-shirt and a tan sweater, his hat in place on his head. In the morning light, he looked as though he were positively _glowing_ with life.

“Whoa, someone’s excited,” Tadashi laughed, striding over and ruffling Hiro’s serious case of bed-head.

“ _Tadashi,”_ Hiro protested, still grinning.

“You need a shower, Ototo,” Tadashi informed, walking past Hiro and over to the computer desk. “Do that, and then we’ll go out for breakfast and then meet everyone at the lab, okay? Oh, and Aunt Cass says ‘Happy birthday’ and that she’s closing the café early today so she can make wings that, and I quote, ‘will melt our faces off’.”

Hiro rolled his eyes, letting out a small laugh before heading towards the door. He paused before entering the hallway, turning back around to look at Tadashi, who was searching for something at the back of one of the desk drawers. Clearing his throat, he lingered in the doorway until Tadashi looked up at him. Concern flashed over the features of his older brother, and he straightened up in the desk chair.

“Are you okay, Hiro?”

Hiro nodded. “Yeah- yeah I’m fine,” he answered. “I just… uh, you know that I love you, Tadashi?” He half-asked, rubbing the back of his neck in embarrassment. He could feel his cheeks turning a light shade of red, but he couldn’t help thinking of what it had felt like to know he’d never be able to tell his brother that again.

Brown eyes softening, Tadashi gave a half-smile. “Yeah, Hiro, I know. I love you, too. You’d tell me if something’s bothering you, right?”

Hiro nodded, returning the smile before walking out into the hallway and towards the bathroom. Once inside, he began stripping down, tossing his hoodie to the floor along with the rest of his clothes. He was just about to turn on the shower when he noticed that his pack of cigarettes had slipped out of his pocket when he’d discarded his hoodie and now laid on the tile floor. _Tadashi would kill me if he saw those…_ he thought, wondering if he should find a way to get rid of them without the older Hamada noticing. For some reason, the thought of tossing them out made him mentally cringe. _No use throwing out a relatively new pack,_  he justified. _I just won’t buy another one after it’s gone. Tadashi doesn’t have to find out._

Turning on the shower, Hiro stepped under the warm water, steam rising up around him. As he began lathering himself in soap, he took to note how thin he’d become in Tadashi’s absence. He recalled the first couple of weeks, during which he’d scarcely eaten a thing, recalled how hunger felt like nothing compared to the ache his brother’s death had left him with. Of course, after the ordeal with Callaghan, he’d gotten slightly better. His friends and Baymax were a huge help, but the months had taken their toll on him. He sighed, pouring a generous amount of shampoo into his long black hair and working it into his scalp. He made a mental note to start taking better care of himself, to start eating more and to adopt a more regular sleeping schedule- and to stop smoking, although that particular point was starting to feel like it’d be more difficult than he originally anticipated.

Reaching through the thick steam, Hiro shut of the water. He stood there a moment, allowing himself to drip-dry as moist drops of water in the air condensate on his skin. After about a minute, he shook his head, water droplets flying everywhere, and pushed aside the shower curtain to grab his towel. Overestimating his reach, he lost his footing on the slippery surface of the bathtub, toppling over the edge. He grasped at the shower curtain for support but ended up pulling the whole thing down on top of himself.

Letting out a yelp, he found himself at an awkward, scrunched up angle, one leg dangling inside the bathtub while the rest of his body lay on the floor, tangled up in the shower curtain. “Oww,” he moaned.

Suddenly, there was a frantic knock at the door. “Hiro? Hiro, what was that?”

“Hello, I am Baymax, your personal healthcare companion. I have heard a sound of distress. On a scale of one to ten, how would you rate your pain?”

Hiro groaned, picking himself up and rubbing his head. He grabbed his towel, drying himself off and tying the cloth around his waist before opening the door to see Tadashi and Baymax hovering outside. “Hiro,” they both said at once.

“I kind of tripped,” he said sheepishly as Baymax scanned him.

Tadashi looked from him to the robot, awaiting a diagnosis. “You have suffered a mild concussion, but your neurotransmitter levels are fully stabilized. Is this because Tadashi is back?”

Tensing up, Hiro glanced at Tadashi. The man’s eyebrows were drawn together, head cocked in confusion. “ _Neurotransmitter levels?”_ he asked. “Baymax, explain.”

“Hiro Hamada’s neurotransmitter levels have stabilized, a sign of recovery from his grief,” Baymax continued. Hiro make a jerking motion with his hand, trying to get the clueless robot to _shut up,_ but Baymax didn’t seem to notice or understand. Tadashi looked to Hiro, arms crossed, demanding an explanation.

Hiro shrugged. “I have no idea what he means. Have you checked his sensor recently? Maybe it’s picking up someone else’s status. I did amplify it to catch Callaghan, remember? Probably just needs to be calibrated.”

Much to the boy’s relief, Tadashi nodded. “Yeah, probably. Go get dressed and I’ll run down and get you some water. Baymax, keep an eye on him.” Tadashi turned to go, calling over his shoulder as he went, “And _do not_ open the box or won’t get to keep it.”

 _Present?_ Hiro thought, immediately excited despite the growing pain in his head.

Hiro walked back into the bathroom, bundling up his clothes and grabbing his cigarettes, which had thankfully been covered by the shower curtain and kept from Tadashi’s sight. Making his way back to the bedroom, he could hear the sound of Baymax shuffling behind him. Inside, sitting on Hiro’s bed (which was now neatly made, most likely by Tadashi) was a square bow about the size of Mochi, wrapped in red paper. His interest was instantly spiked. Tadashi’s gifts to him were always worth getting excited for, and it was hard to resist the temptation to peek at what was beneath the paper.

Instead of peeking, which he knew would only get on Tadashi’s nerves, Hiro went to his dresser and got dressed, trying to ignore Baymax who had yet to deflate. After he was fully clothed- baggy shorts, a red t-shirt, and his blue hoodie –he turned to the health care companion. “Baymax, do you… remember Tadashi dying?”

“Tadashi was killed in a fire.”

Hiro bit his lip. “And…?”

Baymax tilted his oval-shaped head to the side. “And now he is alive with no physical injuries or evidence of burns. I do not understand.”

Hiro nodded. “Yeah, neither do I.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Please feel free to tell me what you liked, what you hated, what you think needs improvement, and anything else you want to say. I'll try to have the next chapter tomorrow, but that may not happen.


	4. Chapter Four

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm going to apologize in advance for the suckiness of this chapter. I've been sick and not feeling very much like writing, and this was the result. I promise the next one will be better.

Once dressed, head still aching from his fall in the shower, Hiro opened the door to find Tadashi in the hall waiting for him, glass of water in hand. “You didn’t touch it, did you?” was the first thing out of his brother’s mouth.

“No,” Hiro promised, accepting the glass and downing it as Tadashi pushed past him and picked up the red box. As soon as the older Hamada had it in his hands, the box shrank to about palm size. He winked at Hiro as he shoved it in his pocket.

“Good. You get to have it later. But first- breakfast.”

Mouth agape, Hiro stumbled after Tadashi, muttering a “satisfied with my care” over his shoulder. After getting tackled by Aunt Cass on his way out, he found himself following his brother down the already bustling streets of San Fransokyo. His mind was on over-drive, trying to work out just how in the hell Tadashi had managed to shrink the box. _Microbots? No, doesn't have a neurotransmitter, and it seems solid._  He thought about asking Tadashi for a hint, but he knew he wouldn’t have any such luck. Not to mention the fact that Tadashi was walking at such a brisk pace that Hiro had to half-jog to keep up with him.

After about five minutes of weaving their way through what felt like the entire San Fransokyo population, nearly getting run over by a bus, and being chased by an old woman’s escaped Chihuahua, they arrived at Hiro’s favorite diner. While it wasn't exactly hot out, the bright sun had Hiro squinting and shrugging off his hoodie as they pushed open the glass door. The familiar little golden bell chimed above their heads when they walked in, and they were greeted by a host with a friendly smile and short blond hair who led them to a small table by the window.

The diner was crowed and bustling with activity, but it was the nice kind of crowded. The Saturday morning kind of crowded, where everyone was in a good mood and refreshed from a night’s sleep- looking forward to the weekend ahead of them with a near contagious energy. The kind of crowded that Hiro found it easy to lose himself in without feeling overwhelmed or stifled. A few tables over, a girl with long dyed-blue pig tails was talking animatedly to the boy across from her who nodded along and listened attentively. Hiro smiled as fond memories of past mornings spent here with Tadashi came flooding back to him. He couldn't even begin to count the number of times he'd sat in one of the booths and acted like the blue-haired girl, going off on an enthusiastic, rapid-fire explanation of his latest interest while Tadashi sat across from him, quietly and intently paying attention no matter how keyed-up and excited Hiro got about the topic. That had to be one of Tadashi's best qualities, thought Hiro. The fact that he always listened.  _Well, almost always,_ a bitter part of him added as he remembered, in vivid detail, Tadashi running into the burning building despite Hiro's pleas.

“Hello, my name’s Rose, and I’ll be your waitress this morning. What can I get you two boys to drink?”

Hiro, jolted out of his thoughts, glanced up to see a woman in her late twenties with bright blue eyes smiling down at them. She held a notepad in one hand and a pencil in the other, patiently awaiting their reply.

“I’ll take water, please,” Tadashi requested. “Hiro?”

The waitress scribbled down the order and then looked up at Hiro, her long brown hair, tied up in a ponytail, swishing as she did.

“Orange juice,” Hiro said absentmindedly, wincing when Tadashi kicked him under the table. “ _Please,”_ he corrected hastily, glaring at his brother, whose brown eyes were wide and innocent.

With a smile and the click of her pen, Rose left their table and headed back towards the kitchen.

“So…” Hiro started, looking across the table at Tadashi. His brother was meticulously folding his napkin into some sort of shape, but he focused on Hiro as soon as he began speaking. “The, uh, the box changes sizes?”

“Mhm."

"Oh okay," Hiro shrugged his shoulders, trying to seem uninterested. "How does it do that?"

Tadashi shook his head, smirking. "Nice try, Hiro."

Rose came back with their drinks and took their orders- an omelet and hash browns for Tadashi and a short-stack of pancakes with bacon for Hiro –and soon enough Hiro found himself shoveling a fork-full of syrup-doused pancake into his mouth. It tasted absolutely perfect, and for the first time in months, he was actually able to stomach over half a plate of food. And, arguably, he probably could’ve eaten more had the pancakes not become ridiculously soggy from sitting in a pool of syrup for too long. Throughout breakfast, he and Tadashi talked about school- how Hiro liked his teachers, what classes he enjoyed and which ones he didn't -as well as plans for upcoming projects. Nearly an hour had gone by when they finally finished. Tadashi paid for the meal while Hiro explained to him an upgrade he thought would be perfect for Baymax (although Tadashi seemed determined that the healthcare companion did not, in fact, need laser vision) and soon after that they were headed to the school to meet their friends.

***

“Hiro! Happy birthday!” was the first thing Honey Lemon said before smothering Hiro in a hug and pressing a dozen kisses to his forehead. She wore a standard lab coat over her pink blouse and yellow pants, and smelled like vanilla and sugar. She handed him a white gift bag with blue and pink tissue paper sticking neatly out of the top. Hiro grinned his gap-toothed grin, accepting the bag.

“Thanks, Honey Lemon.”

From across the lab came a startling crash and a sound similar to that of splattering paint. They turned to see Gogo and Fred in a tangled heap on the floor, covered in some kind of blue goop. “ _Fred,”_ Gogo glowered as she stood shakily to her feet, removing her yellow helmet and nearly slipping backwards again as she tried to take off the magnetically-suspended wheels on her feet. “Didn’t you see the safety tape?” She stuck out her tongue and squinted her eyes in disgust and tried to shake the goo off of her hand, which was now changing from light blue to scarlet in color and didn’t appear to want to detach from her skin.

“Careful!” Honey Lemon called. “It’s motion-sensitive. The more you move it, the more it’s going to cling to you.”

“Coo-ool,” Fred responded, scooping more of it out of the overturned container he and Gogo had crashed into and holding his hand upside-down, marveling at how it help onto his palm and fingers. He shook it, and it turned the same shade of scarlet as Gogo’s.

After getting over the initial shock of crash-landing, Gogo and Fred made their way over to Tadashi, Honey, and Hiro. “Happy birthday, kid,” Gogo said, snapping her bubblegum and attempting to pull some of the goo out of her the purple strand in her hair. “I’d hug you or something, but I don’t think you want Honey lemon’s experiment all over you.” Just as the words left her lips, Fred gathered them all in a group hug.

“Happy birthday, bro,” the school-mascot-by-day, school-mascot-by-night smiled as he pulled away, leaving a little bit of experimental goop on everyone. “Has anyone seen Wasabi?”

No one had an answer to that, and they looked around the lab as if expecting the man to be hiding somewhere. “He said he’d be coming in today…” Gogo muttered, shrugging. “Probably running late.”

“That… or he’s _invisible,_ ” Fred exclaimed.

Tadashi sighed in mock-exasperation. “That’s still not science.”

The group bickered back and forth, playfully so, for the next few minutes. Hiro watched them, content to stay out of it for the moment. They were all so relaxed around each other, completely at ease, and it was hard for him not to fall back into the assumption that everything was as it should be. _What do you mean,_ he asked himself. _They all forgot about Tadashi’s death. Everything_ is _as it should be. Stop worrying so much._ And for a moment, he did. He stopped worrying, and when Wasabi showed up, apologizing profusely for being late as he handed Hiro a light-weight wrapped box, he was able to greet him worry-free. And when he began talking to his friends, opening the gifts, and testing out the unique, frankly _awesome_ gadgets he’d been given by them, he was far too distracted to worry.

Tadashi didn’t pull out the red box until late that afternoon when everyone was getting ready to go home. He placed it on one of the lab tables, and it sprang back up to its original size. Hiro could tell the others, who were busy cleaning up the lab and packing up their things, were trying to give them some space, but he still caught the occasional glance and smile from them as they went about their way. “Go on, Hiro,” Tadashi said. “You can open it now.”

Cautiously, Hiro tore back a corner of the red paper. Once sure that whatever was inside wasn’t going to go haywire and try to fry his face off, he began unwrapping and tearing at the paper. As he did so, Tadashi was excitedly explaining the gift, which, before Hiro touched its surface, appeared to be a simple black cube. “Now I know it’s not much, but I got the idea from your microbots- and partially from Baymax as well. It activates by touch and scans the person to determine what they need most- so kind of like Baymax, only more attuned to the brain’s emotion instead of bodily harm –and then projects images from the user’s memories of things that will comfort, cheer-up, or match the mood of the person using it. Basically, once it's locked onto your brainwaves, you can either allow it to show you what it wants from your memories, or chose what you want to see simply by thinking about it. For transport purposes, it can collapse…”

Hiro began to zone out as he stared at the cube, pressing a finger to the cool surface. Tadashi’s words became a low hum in the background, and images danced before him on the five visible faces of the cube. They switched out and shifted like a slide-show would, and most were of Tadashi and his friends as well as Baymax and Aunt Cass. Hiro quickly realized that everything he could see on the cube were his own memories: looking down over the city as he flew on Baymax, destroying competition at past bot-fights, countless clips of Tadashi working and walking and smiling, Gogo chewing and snapping gum, Aunt Cass on the day she brought Mochi home… he watched in awe as some of his best memories were laid out before him.

Tadashi cleared his throat, bringing Hiro back to reality. He looked slightly nervous, eyebrows drawn together, biting his lower lip, and tapping his fingers rhythmically against his thigh.

“Thanks, Nii-chan,” Hiro whispered. “I love it.”

Tadashi instantly relaxed, pulling his little brother into a tight hug. “Happy birthday, Hiro,” he murmured. Ignoring the quiet "aw" from Honey Lemon, Hiro returned the embrace, which, in all honesty, probably lasted a little longer than it should have, but Hiro wasn’t about to complain. Quite the opposite, actually, seeing as he felt like he never wanted to let go.

***

By the end of the day, Hiro was absolutely exhausted. He nodded off on the ride home in Wasabi’s car and woke up to Tadashi gently shaking his awake. Wasabi bid them goodnight and told Hiro happy birthday one last time before leaving the two to carry Hiro’s things inside and up the stairs to their room. Once they were in the bedroom, Hiro face-planted into Tadashi’s bed, letting out a long sigh of content.

“You now, you do still have your own bed,” Tadashi commented, sounding more amused than irritated.

 _But yours hasn’t been used in so long, and it’s finally starting to smell like you again,_ Hiro thought, knowing he couldn’t say it out loud but unable to keep from thinking it. “Yours is comfier,” he said instead, voice muffled from speaking directly into the mattress.

Tadashi chuckled, and Hiro felt a dip in the bed where he assumed his brother had decided to sit. “They’re exactly the same, Hiro.”

_Not really._

Before he could come up with a suitable answer to that, Aunt Cass called them for dinner. “Come on, Ototo. Just have to make it through Aunt Cass’s wings and then you can sleep till your heart’s content,” Tadashi prompted, nudging Hiro.

Groaning, the younger brother rolled over and off the bed, leading the way out of their room and to the dining room, where Aunt Cass was already setting the table. She grinned at them, a smudge of sauce on the corner of her lips indicating that she’d already tested the food. “Sit down and dig in boys,” she said, placing plates at their seats. As promised, the wings did feel like they were melting Hiro’s face, causing his lips to tingle and his whole mouth to go numb. As they ate, Aunt Cass told them about the customers she’d gotten in the café that morning. Hiro was only half-listening until she mentioned one new-comer in particular that struck her as odd.

“She kept looking around like she was trying to find someone, and she wore this really nice glittery black dress- too nice for a café. And she never once came over to order anything. I was going to say something to her, but the minute I got the time to go over, she was just… gone. Like she vanished or something. It was odd.”

Hiro couldn’t stop himself from asking his next question. “Did she have kind of wavy black hair? And really red lipstick?”

Aunt Cass nodded vigorously, eyes wide. “Yes, exactly. How did you know?”

Hiro shrugged, looking down at his plate to keep them from seeing his expression. “I’ve seen her walking around before,” he half-lied. _What does she want? Is she looking for me?_ He shot a nervous glance at Tadashi, panicking for a moment. _Is she going to go back on the deal?_

Aunt Cass nodded at his response, going on to ask him how his birthday went. He told her in as little detail as possible- partially because his mouth was almost too numb to speak and partially because his mind was now occupied with questions surrounding the woman. When dinner was over, Tadashi and Hiro helped bring dishes into the kitchen before retreating upstairs to get ready for bed.

That night, Hiro climbed into his own bed and waited patiently for Tadashi’s breathing to even out on the other side of the room. Once he was positive his brother was asleep, he quietly pushed back his covers and got up, searching the dark room for his tennis shoes and jacket. After he had those on, he hesitated a moment, then walked back over to his bed and opened the lower drawer of his nightstand. He reached into the very back until he felt his fingers brush across his pack of cigarettes, fumbling a bit as he grabbed it and shoved them in his pocket.

Hiro was out of the room without so much as a stir from Tadashi. At least, he thought he was.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! As always, comments and criticism are very much encouraged and appreciated. I know it's taking me a while to move the story along, but the next chapters are going to pick up the pace, I promise.


	5. Chapter Five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so sorry this took so long!! Who knew the flu would completely kill motivation? Anyways, I did something a little different with this chapter by putting the second part of it Tadashi's third-person perspective. Not sure if I really like it, but it's staying in. Let me know what you think :)

Hiro rounded the corner of the alley, cigarette already burning between his lips. He took a desperate drag, relaxing ever so slightly as the smoke entered his lungs. He held his breath a moment before exhaling and removing the end from his mouth to tap the ash away. “Why were you looking for me?” he asked, leisurely strolling down the dimly-lit passage despite his nervousness. He came to a stop about three yards away from the woman, who had her arms crossed expectantly.

She was standing in the center of the alley, dressed in the same black, glittery gown she had been in the first time. Watching Hiro approach, her earth-brown eyes momentarily flicked to red. “Just wanted to check and see how my favorite client’s first day was going,” she said with mock-genuineness.

Hiro nodded, taking another much needed hit off of the cigarette and assuming the same arms-crossed position as the woman. Although he kept a good distance between them, the logical part of his mind told him that it would do nothing to stop her from getting to him if she really wanted to. The thought didn’t sit well with him, but he tried not to show it. “So, I’m your client now? Do I get to know your name?”

She smirked, bright red lips quirking up mockingly. In a sickening way, their color reminded Hiro of fresh blood, and he cringed inwardly. “I have a lot of names, Hiro,” she offered vaguely. “Which one do you want?”

An involuntary shiver made its way down Hiro’s spine. “Is that your way of telling me you’re the devil or something?” Hiro asked, only half joking. _What exactly have I gotten myself into?_ He jumped at a loud crash that came from behind him, turning to see a mangy cat darting out of an open dumpster. He breathed a shaky sigh of relief, heart pounding.

The woman snorted, although whether it was at Hiro’s comment or his reaction to the cat, he wasn’t sure. “That’s a nice compliment, but no.” She uncrossed her arms, flipping her hair over her shoulder and giving Hiro an almost predatory look. He resisted the urge to take a step back. “I’m more along the lines of ‘or something’. Now, little Hiro, I have some business to tend to. Don’t worry, though, I have a feeling we’ll be seeing a lot more of each other.” She turned to go, before pausing, saying over her shoulder: “Oh, and between us, you might want to put that out. Big brother’s on his way and I doubt he’d be very pleased.” With that, she vanished. No sound, no flashing light or warning. She was just… gone.

Hiro stood there, frustrated, staring at the spot where the demon had previously been. He may have stayed a lot longer had he not heard footsteps approaching. Quickly, he dropped his cigarette, stamping it out into the damp pavement. When he turned around, Tadashi was at the entrance of the alley, still in his sleep pants and an old coffee-stained t-shirt.

Hiro did his best to look innocent, which usually only made him look guiltier, and raised his hand in greeting. “’Sup, bro?” he laughed nervously. “Out for a stroll?”

Tadashi glared at him, dimly illuminated in the soft glow of the street lights. Disappointment mingled with muted relief radiated off of the older Hamada. Hiro contemplated whether it’d be better to turn and high-tail it in the opposite direction or stay put and hope for the best. He chose the latter.

“Unbelievable,” Tadashi sighed as he neared. “Wait no, it actually is believable.” When he got closer, Hiro could see him wrinkle his nose. “Ugh, why does it smell like sulfur? And smoke?”

Hiro, quick on his feet despite being a poor liar, came up with simple explanation. “There were some guys setting off firecrackers,” he improvised, subtly sliding his foot over the cigarette butt on the ground. Now that he thought about it, it really did smell like sulfur– a sort of rotten-egg scent the seemed to linger in the air. He brought his mind back to the last time the demon-lady had been here. Had the scent been present then, too?

“You reek of smoke, Hiro,” Tadashi said, narrowing his brown eyes, now standing mere inches away. Hiro had to crane his neck to get a good look at Tadashi, and for some unknown reason, something appeared different about the man. Maybe it was the way his hair was tousled from lack of combing, or the fact that his face was slightly scruffy from not shaving, but Hiro had never really taken into account just how _attractive_ Tadashi was.

_Did I really just think that?_

The boy shrugged, feeling his cheeks heat up as he pushed the thought away and tried to remember what his brother had said. _Smoke, smell, think of an excuse,_ Hiro’s brain supplied, bringing the younger Hamada back into focus. “They were smoking,” he lied, praying to whatever deity was listening that he sounded convincing. “I was talking to them to see if they’d let me light one of the firecrackers. Probably picked up some of the smell while I was over there.”

Tadashi sighed, shaking his head. “You are so… Hiro, you can’t just talk to strangers like that! What if they’d been dangerous? What would you have done if they ganged up on you?”

 _That’s a very good question. Another good question is why can I not stop staring at you?_ “Um…”

Grabbing Hiro’s arm, Tadashi pulled him towards the exit of the alley. “Come one, we’re going home.” Hiro followed obediently, listening to Tadashi lecture him about strangers the whole way.

***

Tadashi had no idea what had gotten into his brother. Ever since the early morning of his birthday, when he’d insisted on sleeping in Tadashi’s bed for the first time in weeks since the fire, everything about his brother had seemed off. In fact, Tadashi was beginning to really worry about the doe-eyed genius– more so than he usually did.

The whole off-ness could be seen in the way Hiro looked at him a little too long- like he couldn’t quite believe Tadashi was really there. It was shown in the way Hiro woke at night, whimpering and crying Tadashi’s name out softly, voice choked with the sound of muffled sobs. Usually, when that happened, Hiro would end up standing at Tadashi’s bedside, nudging his brother awake with a frantic look in his eyes and tremoring hands. And even though Tadashi knew they were a bit too old to be sharing a bed, he opened the covers up to Hiro and pulled his brother close, running comforting hands through his hair and assuring him that he was there. Hiro had had nightmares and was a little more anxious than usual the first few weeks following the fire, but nothing to this degree. Of course, Tadashi wasn’t about to complain about the extra attention from his little brother, but it still concerned him.

But it didn’t bother him nearly as much as the sneaking out at night.

Sneaking out wasn’t anything new for Hiro, but in the past it was always to attend a bot-fight. Now, Tadashi had no idea what Hiro did during his late-night endeavors. He’d originally assumed Hiro had rejoined the bot-fighting scene, but that theory was tossed out when he found MegaBot stashed in one of the computer desk drawers. And by the time Tadashi found the boy each night, Hiro was already on his way back home, hands shoved in his pockets, looking for all the world like the most relaxed, clear-minded person Tadashi had ever seen.

That first night he’d found Hiro standing in the alley, he could’ve sworn he heard a female voice, which led him to the idea that perhaps Hiro was sneaking off to see someone. Tadashi wasn’t quite sure why that thought bothered him as much as it did, but he eventually convinced himself that it was because he deserved to know who Hiro was seeing. Just to make sure they were good for him. And if it was someone Hiro had to sneak away to visit? All the more reason to feel uneasy about it.

All of this had been consuming Tadashi’s mind for the past week, but now, as he and Hiro worked together in the garage, he decided to bring it up.

“Hiro,” he started, taking a break from rewiring Baymax’s scanner, which had somehow shorted out that morning. The two had frustratedly been trying to find the cause of the malfunction for the past two and a half hours.

“Mhm?” Hiro responded distractedly, unable to form a full word seeing as he was holding a screwdriver between his teeth as he fiddled with Baymax’s charging station.

Tadashi cleared his throat. “You know, if you ever want to talk about something, you can tell me, right?” The raven-haired boy didn’t so much as glance in Tadashi’s direction, but he noticed his back stiffen slightly and his hands stop moving for a second.

“Mmhmm?”

“I mean, if you had an _interest_ in someone,” Tadashi said the words through near-gritted teeth, the very notion of Hiro being with anyone bringing him an abnormal feeling of… _jealousy? No, that can’t be right. He’s your little brother, bonehead._ “You could tell me about them.”

Now Hiro did turn around, eyes squinted suspiciously. He removed the screwdriver from his mouth, twirling it in his hand. Another weird thing, Tadashi noted. Whether it be drumming his fingers or twirling pencils, Hiro was never still. The only times he seemed fully at ease was at night when he’d be walking home from God-knows-what. “Where’s this coming from?” Hiro asked slowly.

Tadashi shrugged, trying to act nonchalant. Thankfully for him, he was pretty good at composing himself. “Well you sneak out all the time, but I know you’re not going to bot-fights. So I was thinking maybe it’s because you’re going out to see someone.” When he said it out loud, Tadashi felt mildly ridiculous.

Hiro looked on the verge of laughing. “I just like going out to clear my head, Nii-chan,” he promised. “Being a genius isn’t exactly easy. I gotta relax the mind, take some me-time.” He gave Tadashi a lop-sided grin, which the older Hamada brother found oddly endearing and reassuring, although he couldn’t shake the feeling that Hiro was hiding _something._ There was something about him that seemed hurt– a waver in his voice, the way he looked at Tadashi like he knew some awful secret that he wouldn’t dare share. “Besides, you’ve seen the Fransokyo night-life. Interesting stuff. Very inspiring.”

Tadashi nodded, jaw set and eyebrows drawn, fixing Hiro with a gaze that let the boy know he was on to him. “Uh-hu. And your nightmares? Do you want to talk about those?”

Hiro grimaced and shook his head, looking down at the ground. “I’d rather not.” His words were barely a whisper, and Tadashi almost let the issue drop.

“I think you should,” he pressed, pinning the younger boy with a stern look.

“Tadashi… please. I really don’t want to.”

Sighing, Tadashi stood up and crossed over to Hiro, kneeling down in front of his brother and placing a hand on his shoulder. “Hiro, whatever it is that’s bothering you… you can tell me.”

Hiro shook his head, closing his eyes. “Yeah, whatever, Tadashi,” he sighed.

“I’m serious, Hiro. I’m always here for you. All you have to do is let me in. And maybe take a break from the sneaking out. I need my sleep.”

Raising his eyebrows, Hiro’s lips parted incredulously. “No one said you always had to come chasing after me.”

Tadashi smirked, standing and ruffling Hiro’s hair. “What?” he asked. “You want me to just let my little brother run off into the night unsupervised? I don’t think so.”

“I’m fifteen, Tadashi. I think I could use a _little_ bit of freedom, don’t you?”

“Not at three ‘o’ clock in the morning, you don’t,” Tadashi scoffed.

“Unbelievable.”

Tadashi, assuming his position back at his desk, smiled at Hiro. The boy was already turned back towards Baymax’s charging station, but even from there, Tadashi could tell something was different. The tense, rigid way Hiro held himself. The way the boy would pause to glance over his shoulder at Tadashi when he didn’t think his brother was looking. The haunted, aged look in his wide brown eyes.

_Oh, Hiro. What happened?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Hopefully it won't take me as long for the next chapter. As usual, comments, recommendations, and criticism are greatly appreciated.


	6. Chapter Six

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so I'm just going to go ahead and say that I probably will not be updating more than twice a week with exams and the holidays coming up. Sorry for being so irregular with the updating. Anyways, hope y'all enjoy this one and that it doesn't disappoint (I know a few of you were waiting for this to happen).

Ever since the explosion, time held a new meaning for Hiro. He spent hours dwelling on seconds, minutes thinking over years. At the time, everything to him felt numb and void, but that didn't stop him from feeling the effects of the dragging days. Every moment that passed felt like an eternity, but he existed with the constant knowledge that even an eternity could be reduced to ashes in a single moment.

A little over a month had passed since the deal with the demon, and time had yet again taken a different meaning for him. Every fleeting second was precious and numbered, and eternity was less than a breath away. Time didn't seem to drag but rather to fly by faster than Hiro thought possible, leaving him with the sinking feeling that he should've done more with his day, should have made more of his time while he still had it. He usually did his best not to focus on his impending death sentence, but every now and then, the thought would creep into his mind, leaving him short of breath and nauseous. It struck him at odd times, often when he was alone, and he would spend what seemed like hours curled into a ball, fingers knotted in his hair as his whole body trembled and his palms turned clammy. Afterwards, still short of breath with his heart pounding, he would shakily light a cigarette and take long pulls until he relaxed enough to resume what he was doing.

Of course, he never told anyone about these episodes– especially not Tadashi. Never Tadashi. Instead, he did what he could to minimize them by keeping himself occupied with other things. When he felt the darker corners of his mind begin to drift, he would refocus himself with a more pressing thoughts, like that research paper he had to write. Or whether or not he should take a break from planning his next project to go find Tadashi, who had been oddly absent this morning. In fact, Hiro hadn't seen his brother since early that morning when he'd sneaked back into their room. Tadashi had been sleeping soundly when Hiro entered their shared room, which was kind of strange considering the older Hamada was usually up and searching for Hiro.

Hiro was just about to get off of the computer chair to go downstairs and find Tadashi when the bedroom door swung open. In stepped the older Hamada brother, outfitted in jeans, a t-shirt, and a gray cardigan. He shut the door behind him, removing his hat and tossing it onto his bed.  

"Hey, where've you-" Hiro's greeting died on his lips when he noticed the scowl on Tadashi's face. "Everything okay?"

Tadashi crossed his arms, leaning against the door frame and pinning Hiro with his best disappointed look, which happened to be pretty good. "I don't know, Hiro. Is it?"

Hiro flinched back, wondering just where this was coming from. He rarely saw Tadashi, who was a master at keeping his composure, this tense. He almost looked scary, even. "Um, yes?" Hiro asked.

Tadashi’s jaw clenched, and he took a visible moment to relax. His broad chest rose and fell with a deep breath, and he closed his eyes for a few seconds. We he opened them and looked at Hiro again, he appeared less angry and more disappointed. Hiro eyed him wearily, wondering what this was about and trying to think back to anything he may have said or accidentally broken recently.

It wasn’t until Tadashi reached into his pocket and produced a carton of cigarettes that everything clicked and Hiro’s stomach dropped.

“Nii-chan, I can–” he started frantically, about to stand up when he was cut off by a single glare from Tadashi.

“Smoking, Hiro? Really?” Tadashi glowered, composure slipping away with each word. “Do you know how bad that is for you?”

Figuring the question was rhetorical, Hiro kept his mouth shut. _How did he find those?_

“I figured out your little hide-out in the alley and waited to follow you last night,” Tadashi said as if reading his mind. “Where did you even get these? Was it from someone on campus?” he paused, eyes widening. “Was it Fred? Oh, I’m going to kill him.”

Hiro shook his head, looking at the floor. Tadashi was absolutely _seething._ Hiro felt a mix of shame an terror as Tadashi paced the length of their room, gesturing his hands in agitation as he talked. _He wasn’t even this pissed the first time he busted me at a bot-fight,_  Hiro thought.

“It wasn’t Fred,” he promised, wondering how Tadashi would react if it had been. “And chill; it’s not like you’ve never smoked before.”

Tadashi stopped his pacing to turn and give Hiro an incredulous look. “Not as a minor, that’s for damned sure. And I never got addicted to it, Hiro. How many have you smoked?”

“I don’t _know.”_ He did a mental calculation, tallying the months since Tadashi's death in his mind. “Five? Maybe more?”

“Really?” Tadashi asked, opening the lid and tilting the opening of the box towards Hiro to reveal three remaining smokes. “Because almost all of these are gone.”

Hiro said nothing in response to that, and Tadashi’s eyes widened, a whole new look of horror and anger washing over his features. “You mean _packs?"_  Tadashi nearly shouted. _"_ How long has this been going on? _”_

 _Ever since you ran to your death and left me alone,_ Hiro thought bitterly. “A while.”

“Unbelievable.” Tadashi just stared at him, at loss for words. “Un _believable.”_

A thick, uncomfortable silence fell over the brothers. Hiro started at the ground, feeling Tadashi’s heated glare burning into him. After the silence stretched for a little too long, Hiro glanced up to see Tadashi had put the cigarettes back in his pocket. The older Hamada looked less angry now– more exasperated than anything, really –and Hiro bit back a sigh of relief, thankful that the man no longer looked like he was about to murder anyone. Tadashi studied Hiro like he was sizing the boy up, trying to figure him out with his eyes alone and coming up with nothing. It hurt to see his brother this confused and hurt, but Hiro couldn't think of anything to say that would make it better. Even the truth would leave Tadashi guilt-ridden and probably even more angry than before. Hiro could hear that lecture already, and it took everything he had not to groan and roll his eyes as he imagined all the ways Tadashi would find to call him "irresponsible".

“Hiro,” Tadashi finally said, breaking the silence with a much softer voice than before. Hiro looked up, startled at the change in his brother's tone, and waited for Tadashi to continue. “Why didn’t you come to me?”

Before he could think it over, Hiro blurted out the truth. Or, at least, part of it. “You weren’t there.”

Time froze.

The fleeting seconds and minute-long eternities came to what felt like a complete stop, no longer dragging or racing by. A range of emotions were plastered on Tadashi’s face– hurt, guilt, sorrow, affection, feelings Hiro couldn’t even begin to place –and the younger Hamada was able to see them all plain as day.

_I shouldn’t have said that._

_What if he figures it out?_

_What would happen?_

And then, just like that, time lurched into motion. Tadashi was in front of Hiro, kneeling down so that they were eye-level. When he spoke, his voice was soft, barely above a whisper, and it was still such a contrast to his lecture voice that it left Hiro confused and slightly breathless as he tried to keep up. “I’m always here for you, Hiro. What makes you think I’m not?”

“Because it just… felt like you weren’t,” Hiro half-lied, voice matching Tadashi’s in volume.

Tadashi cupped Hiro’s cheek with his palm, gently angling his face so that their eyes met. “I’m not going anywhere, Hiro. Okay?”

“Okay.” Hiro held his breath, feeling the warmth from Tadashi’s palm radiate across his face. He couldn’t look away from his brother’s pleading eyes, and he wondered what would happen if they just stayed like that. If he spent the rest of his numbered seconds here, sitting in that chair with Tadashi kneeling down in front of him- looking for all the world like he was never going to leave Hiro's side -would his eternity catch up with him? And if it did, Tadashi would be able to stop it, wouldn't he? Because he was always there for Hiro. He was always there, and he was always going to be able to help him because how could he not be? Unfortunately, Hiro knew the answer to that last question. Tadashi would always be there until he wasn't. The seconds would feel like eternities until fire caught up and everything just turned to smoke and ash.

"Hiro, promise me something, okay?" Tadashi said.

Hiro nodded, unable to correctly form words with Tadashi so close. Even after a month of his brother being back, Hiro couldn't quite believe he was really here, but it was just as hard to imagine him being gone. He often found himself noticing little things Tadashi did that he hadn't even known he missed until now, found himself taking note of his brother's quirks that could be equal parts annoying and endearing.

"Promise you won't keep whatever's weighing on you from me forever."

Hiro swallowed thickly, struggling to form a coherent thought. _What's wrong with you? You should not be this flustered; it's just Tadashi._ "I promise," he finally managed.

Tadashi gave a little half smile, and Hiro's heart skipped a beat. _He's your brother,_ he reminded himself, not totally sure why he even needed to. Dropping his hand to his side, Tadashi stood up, the smile dropping as he fixed Hiro with another stern look. "And no more smoking," he ordered. "Got that, knucklehead?"

"Loud and clear," Hiro muttered, rolling his eyes.

Tadashi shook his head. "I won't tell Aunt Cass this time, but if I even  _smell_ smoke on you, all bets are off and you're going to wish you'd never seen a cigarette in your life." He paused, letting that sink in before adding, "Now come on; Fred invited everyone over for lunch."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! As always, comments and criticism are very welcome :)


End file.
